Hump Day Humor

I've read this story before, but I have absolutely no idea if it's true or not. Either way, it's pretty funny. Enjoy!

Attached is some correspondence which actually occurred between a London hotel's staff and one of its guests. The London hotel involved submitted this to the Sunday Times. No name was mentioned.

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Dear Maid,

Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and another three in the shower soap dish. They are in my way.

Thank you,

S. Berman

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Dear Room 635,

I am not your regular maid. She will be back tomorrow, Thursday, from her day off. I took the 3 hotel soaps out of the shower soap dish as you requested. The 6 bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put on top of your Kleenex dispenser in case you should change your mind. This leaves only the 3 bars I left today which my instructions from the management is to leave 3 soaps daily.

I hope this is satisfactory.

Kathy, Relief Maid

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Dear Maid -- I hope you are my regular maid.

Apparently Kathy did not tell you about my note to her concerning the little bars of soap. When I got back to my room this evening I found you had added 3 little Camays to the shelf under my medicine cabinet.

I am going to be here in the hotel for two weeks and have brought my own bath-size Dial so I won't need those 6 little Camays which are on the shelf. They are in my way when shaving, brushing teeth, etc.

Please remove them.

S. Berman

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Dear Mr. Berman,

My day off was last Wed. so the relief maid left 3 hotel soaps which we are instructed by the management. I took the 6 soaps which were in your way on the shelf and put them in the soap dish where your Dial was. I put the Dial in the medicine cabinet for your convenience.

I didn't remove the 3 complimentary soaps which are always placed inside the medicine cabinet for all new check-ins and which you did not object to when you checked in last Monday. Please let me know if I can of further assistance.

Your regular maid,

Dotty

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Dear Mr. Berman,

The assistant manager, Mr. Kensedder, informed me this A.M. that you called him last evening and said you were unhappy with your maid service. I have assigned a new girl to your room. I hope you will accept my apologies for any past inconvenience. If you have any future complaints please contact me so I can give it my personal attention. Call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM. Thank you.

Elaine Carmen

Housekeeper

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Dear Miss Carmen,

It is impossible to contact you by phone since I leave the hotel for business at 745 AM and don't get back before 530 or 6PM. That's the reason I called Mr. Kensedder last night. You were already off duty.

I only asked Mr. Kensedder if he could do anything about those little bars of soap. The new maid you assigned me must have thought I was a new check-in today, since she left another 3 bars of hotel soap in my medicine cabinet along with her regular delivery of 3 bars on the bath-room shelf. In just 5 days here I have accumulated 24 little bars of soap. Why are you doing this to me?

S. Berman

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Dear Mr. Berman,

Your maid, Kathy, has been instructed to stop delivering soap to your room and remove the extra soaps. If I can be of further assistance, please call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM.

Thank you,

Elaine Carmen,

Housekeeper

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Dear Mr. Kensedder,

My bath-size Dial is missing. Every bar of soap was taken from my room including my own bath-size Dial. I came in late last night and had to call the bellhop to bring me 4 little Cashmere Bouquets.

S. Berman

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Dear Mr. Berman,

I have informed our housekeeper, Elaine Carmen, of your soap problem. I cannot understand why there was no soap in your room since our maids are instructed to leave 3 bars of soap each time they service a room. The situation will be rectified immediately. Please accept my apologies for the inconvenience.

Martin L. Kensedder

Assistant Manager

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Dear Mrs. Carmen,

Who the hell left 54 little bars of Camay in my room? I came in last night and found 54 little bars of soap. I don't want 54 little bars of Camay. I want my one damn bar of bath-size Dial. Do you realize I have 54 bars of soap in here. All I want is my bath size Dial.

Please give me back my bath-size Dial.

S. Berman

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Dear Mr. Berman,

You complained of too much soap in your room so I had them removed.

Then you complained to Mr. Kensedder that all your soap was missing so I personally returned them. The 24 Camays which had been taken and the 3 Camays you are supposed to receive daily (sic). I don't know anything about the 4 Cashmere Bouquets. Obviously your maid, Kathy, did not know I had returned your soaps so she also brought 24 Camays plus the 3 daily Camays. I don't know where you got the idea this hotel issues bath-size Dial. I was able to locate some bath-size Ivory which I left in your room.

Elaine Carmen

Housekeeper

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Dear Mrs. Carmen,

Just a short note to bring you up-to-date on my latest soap inventory. As of today I possess:

On shelf under medicine cabinet - 18 Camay in 4 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2.

On Kleenex dispenser - 11 Camay in 2 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 3.

On bedroom dresser - 1 stack of 3 Cashmere Bouquet, 1 stack of 4 hotel-size Ivory, and 8 Camay in 2 stacks of 4.

Inside medicine cabinet - 14 Camay in 3 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2.

In shower soap dish - 6 Camay, very moist.

On northeast corner of tub - 1 Cashmere Bouquet, slightly used.

On northwest corner of tub - 6 Camays in 2 stacks of 3.

Please ask Kathy when she services my room to make sure the stacks are neatly piled and dusted. Also, please advise her that stacks of more than 4 have a tendency to tip. May I suggest that my bedroom window sill is not in use and will make an excellent spot for future soap deliveries.

One more item, I have purchased another bar of bath-sized Dial which I am keeping in the hotel vault in order to avoid further misunderstandings.

S. Berman

Book Review - Betrayed by P.C. Cast and Kristin Cast

Betrayed (House of Night #2)
by P.C. Cast and Kristin Cast
Young Adult

Book Number: 3 (Summer "Beach Reads" Challenge)

Summary: Fledgling vampyre Zoey Redbird has managed to settle in at the House of Night. She’s come to terms with the vast powers the vampyre goddess, Nyx, has given her, and is getting a handle on being the new Leader of the Dark Daughters. Best of all, Zoey finally feels like she belongs--like she really fits in. She actually has a boyfriend…or two. Then the unthinkable happens: Human teenagers are being killed, and all the evidence points to the House of Night. While danger stalks the humans from Zoey’s old life, she begins to realize that the very powers that make her so unique might also threaten those she loves. Then, when she needs her new friends the most, death strikes the House of Night, and Zoey must find the courage to face a betrayal that could break her heart, her soul, and jeopardize the very fabric of her world. (from Goodreads)

My thoughts: In the second book in the series, we begin to discover that all isn't as it appears at the House of Night. Things that Zoey found odd in the first book--like seeing the "ghosts" of dead fledglings, and her instinct telling her not to confide in her mentor, the High Priestess--are revisited. But this time Zoey begins to discover that all isn't as it appears. While she learns that she can't trust her High Priestess, a student who was her enemy starts to become the one person who knows everything. There's also the beginnings of an uncomfortable storyline (at least, it's uncomfortable for me) between Zoey and all of the boys in her life. For me, the uncomfortable part is between Zoey and one of the teachers. Oy. Anyway, if you've read the first book, definitely give this one a go. It's just as well-written as the first, but now we're getting into the really juicy stuff.

Friday Five

This afternoon we're taking a bunch of old electronic things that Ben had stored in our computer room to the electronic recycling center in Fort Worth. Our nursery furniture is supposed to be delivered Monday, so this weekend we're finishing up taking the last of the stuff out of that room. (Yay!) So just for Ben, here's a geekery-themed Friday Five. :)

From fellow EtsyVeg teammate Karin Lorenc, Pi Mug in Red - 16 oz., $25.00
From fellow Etsy Fort Worth teammate Casey's Clutter, Googly Eyes Ring, $7.50
From Cherry Laurel Designs, I Said MEH glow in the dark binary beanie, $35.00
From Babywood, Mac Daddy Onesie, $14.00
From Sass & Peril, Open Your Heart Screenprint, $15.00

Music Monday

Ben played this song for me last week, and I didn't really appreciate it until Saturday afternoon when we heard them talking about it on the Ticket. They not only played the remix version I had heard already, but they played part of the original. I really think having some context of where the remix comes from is what makes it good. So listen to at least part of the first clip, then enjoy the second one. :)

Friday Five

I realized this morning that I'll miss having fresh blueberries on my Kashi cereal after blueberry season is over. Yes, I know I could buy frozen berries, or buy a bunch of fresh now and freeze them, but it's just not quite the same. Oh, blueberry, how I love you.

From Erin Reynolds Photography, Blueberries Kitchen Art - Fine Art Photograph (8x8), $24.00

From Magic Hands Workshop, Blueberry Sea Salt Bar, $5.50
From Etsy Fort Worth teammate Fitzy Sparrow, Blueberry Estate vintage lucite charm earrings, $14.00
From EtsyVeg teammate Caramel Diezel, Earthy Urban Organic Cotton Beanie - berry with cream, blueberry, lime and kiwi stripes - $22.00
From Bovine Bubbles and Hogwash Ltd, Blue Nectarine Jam, $7.00

Hump Day Humor

For today's Hump Day Humor I thought I'd share a funny story about my dog, Booger, that happened yesterday morning. I had turned on the water for the shower to heat up, and while I was getting ready to get in I was singing this song to myself (and the baby):



I love that song! :) Anyway, the dog comes in, looking up at me and wagging his tail. (He enjoys being sung to also.) Then as I kept singing, he starts jumping up, running in little circles, and whining. It looked pretty ridiculous, but I couldn't figure out why he was acting like that. Then I remembered. The song I had been singing had the word C-A-R in it. Put that word with R-I-D-E and you've got Booger's favorite pastime. I was just singing, but he thought I was asking him if he wanted to go for a ride in the car.
At this point I totally felt like the worst doggie-momma ever, especially when I got into the shower and he's still running around the bathroom and standing so he can see me better through the shower door. And I would have taken him for a ride in the car after that, but by the time I was out of the shower and finished getting ready, he didn't seem interested anymore. :)

Book Review - The Darkest Fire by Gena Showalter

The Darkest Fire (Lords of the Underworld #.5)
by Gena Showalter
Paranormal Romance

Book Number: 2 (Summer "Beach Reads" Challenge)
Book Number: 1 (Summer Romance Challenge)

Summary:
He is the guardian of hell, more monster than man. She is the goddess of oppression, more angel than woman. Together they will enter the flames to battle a horde of demon lords -- and discover a passion unlike any other... Discover the origin of the dimOuniak and the demon spirits trapped within.
(from Goodreads)

My thoughts: I've read the first three books in this series, and came across this prequel novella. It was good, but not nearly as good as the others in the series. It was interesting to read about how the Demon Lords first escaped and became trapped in Pandora's Box, which is discussed in the other books in the series. Overall, not the best book I've read in a while.

Music Monday

This morning feels like an Enya morning. Don't ask why, it just does. Enjoy!

Sunday Spotlight

Yes, I know what you're thinking. (At least, I know what Ben will be thinking when he reads this.) In any event, I'm signing up for another book challenge! *gasp* But Jenn, you've just started one? However will you manage two reading challenges with all of the things you're doing around the house, plus making fabulous soap and bath goodies? Never fear, I've got it under control. :) I read while the paper shredder is resting so I don't burn out the motor, or in the evening before bed, or in the car (while Ben drives, not if I'm driving, duh).

This challenge is the 2010 Summer Romance Challenge. Romances are some of my favorite books to read. And if I happen to read a romance, it can count towards my other challenge too. Two birds with one stone!

The challenge started back in June, but since it goes until Sept. 30, I think I can still manage. The challenge: read 8 romances by the deadline. Woo hoo! Come join me, it should be fun!

Book Review - Marked by P.C. Cast and Kristin Cast

For those of you who may not remember, I had entered myself in the 2010 Summer Beach Reads Book Challenge. My personal goal is to read 8 books by the end of the contest, August 30th.

Marked (House of Night #1) P.C. Cast and Kristin Cast
Young Adult

Book Number: 1 (Summer "Beach Reads" Challenge)

Summary: The House of Night series is set in a world very much like our own, except in 16-year-old Zoey Redbird's world, vampyres have always existed. In this first book in the series, Zoey enters the House of Night, a school where, after having undergone the Change, she will train to become an adult vampire--that is, if she makes it through the Change. Not all of those who are chosen do. It’s tough to begin a new life, away from her parents and friends, and on top of that, Zoey finds she is no average fledgling. She has been Marked as special by the vampyre Goddess, Nyx. But she is not the only fledgling at the House of Night with special powers. When she discovers that the leader of the Dark Daughters, the school's most elite club, is misusing her Goddess-given gifts, Zoey must look deep within herself for the courage to embrace her destiny--with a little help from her new vampyre friends. (from Goodreads)

My thoughts: I've read this one before, but it's been a while. And here's where my brother in law would laugh at me: I'm rereading this series in order to get to the latest book in the series, which I haven't read. And now that Cliff knows, I'm sure he'll give me a hard time. :) Anyway, I decided to reread this series because I have read so many paranormal/vampire books since I first read these, that I didn't really remember any details about the books.

As the first book in a series, some of this book is setting up characters and filling you in on Zoey's world. Although, since she's Marked as a vampyre in the beginning of the book, you're learning about it right along with her. In Zoey's world, there have always been vampyres, but that doesn't mean that they're socially accepted by humans. Zoey's step-dad is an elder in the People of Faith, which is the super-conservative mainstream human religion, and he, along with most of Zoey's human friends and family, think of her as a monster after she's been Marked. What's interesting to me is how Zoey is able to combine what she learns at the House of Night with her grandmother's Cherokee ways.

If you like vampire stories blended with some supernatural goings-on, definitely take a look at this book. It's a fast-paced, quick read that will have you wanting to read more, to find out what exactly is going on at the House of Night.

And the Winner is...

First of all, thank you to all who entered my Birthday Giveaway Blowout! I was excited to have so many contestants. But on to the part that everyone is waiting for -- the winner. With the help of impartial judge random.org to help me select the winner, here we go.

Congratulations goes to...

Kylie!

Thanks again to all of the contestants, I hope to see you back at the next giveaway!

Happy Birthday to... Me!

Well, it's July 7, which means it's my birthday (yay!), but it's also the last day to enter my Birthday Giveaway Blowout. The contest closes at midnight tonight, CST, and I'll announce the winner tomorrow morning when I wake up. Oh, and don't forget to vote in the poll at the top right of the page. Thanks! :)

And now, since it's Wednesday, how about some Hump Day Humor? This kitteh can come over to my house. I've been de-cluttering our house room by room, and yesterday I finally started on the dreaded office. Seriously, it has been the room where we just stick things that we don't know where to put them, which means there was a little pathway (sort of) from the door to the printer and Ben's computer. Oy. I cleared away about half of the room yesterday (yay!) and now can get to the shredder to start on the two boxes of things that need to be shredded or filed. So really, sad kitteh can come over here. :)

Music Monday

I hope you all had a fun and safe 4th of July! Mansfield put on a pretty good fireworks show this year, and the best part is that it's fairly close to our neighborhood, so we just walked down the block to our neighborhood pool and watched from the playground. We could watch the pretty fireworks without having to deal with all of the traffic and people like we would have if we'd actually gone to the fireworks show. Nice!

Ben found this song on YouTube and showed it to me the other day. It's pretty funny. Ben's favorite part is the bear at the back, but keep your eye out for the Swedish Chef. :) Enjoy!

Oh, and if you're looking for the giveaway, it's right here!

Sunday Spotlight

Are you looking for the Bohemian Rose giveaway? Click here!

I'm currently included in a great Fruit Salad Treasury on Etsy, along with other talented Etsy Fort Worth artisans. I'm also featured in a great Old Fashioned Treasury with some talented EtsyVeg artisans. Come take a look!

Today's Sunday Spotlight is a bit different. Instead of spotlighting a handmade artisan's shop, I'd like you to take a look at another blog... A Fanatic's Book Blog actually. Jessica posts great book reviews and book giveaways. Definitely browse through her blog. I know every time I do, I have more books to add to my Amazon wish list!

Currently Jessica's blog is co-hosting the 2010 Summer Beach Reads Challenge. It's easy peasy to sign up for the challenge, and the giveaway prizes at the end of the challenge are a cute crochet buddy, Mr. Octavio the Octopus, and a copy of Low Red Moon.

Now, I had just recently started reading Mists of Avalon, which so far is good, although I'm really not that far yet... But to me it doesn't fit the description of "beach read" so I'm going to postpone this one. I've been told that it's a great book, so I'll definitely come back to it, but I'll start with some "beach reads" first. Vampire books and paranormal romance, here I come!

Keeping in mind that I'm still de-cluttering the house, and next week am actually starting on the dreaded office, which will soon be the baby's room so everything has to go out of it, I don't think I'll reach the level of Shark in the challenge. I think I'll aim for Minnow. I know, sounds like I'm not aiming high, but Minnow is 8 books read by August 31. Considering all the stuff I've got to get done around the house between now and then, I'd say Minnow is a good goal for me. :)

Birthday Giveaway Blowout!

Today is my mom's birthday - happy birthday, mom! :) So I'm giving away all of her favorite Bohemian Rose products. You don't have to get them in her favorite scent (which is Tir na Nog, by the way), but instead I'll let you choose your own.

Since she's my mom, I'm pretty sure she's tested just about every product that I've made, back from the very beginning with that first batch of soap. So she has a lot of experience in what makes a favorite Bohemian Rose product for her.

Now, on to the part I know you're waiting (patiently) to hear. What you'll win:
-one bar of soap, in your choice of scent
-one sugar scrub, in your choice of scent
-one facial scrubbing mask
-one lip balm, in your choice of flavor

Wow!
How to enter: Visit either my Etsy or 1000 Markets shop and leave a comment here telling me your favorite item in my shop. And please make sure I have a way to contact you if you win.

Extra entries:
-1 extra entry if you follow my blog
-1 extra entry if you follow me on Twitter
-1 extra entry if you fan me on Facebook
-1 extra entry *each time* you mention the giveaway on your blog, Facebook page, or Twitter. Just send me the link for each one to get credit.
-4 extra entries for each item purchased from me during the giveaway. Just be sure to put "Giveaway" in the notes to seller at checkout to get credit.

The Birthday Giveaway Blowout starts today (July 1) and ends on my birthday (July 7) at midnight CST ('cause that's my time zone!). Good luck!